Tag Archives: Humor

Papa, Why Hast Thou Forsaken Me?

Posted on June 4, 2012 by Tom Garrett

It’s safe to say that I’m a fat guy pizza aficionado.  Papa John’s is my favorite among the chain pizza “restaurants.”  In fact, placing a Sunday order to PJ’s is an almost-weekly ritual during football season.  Put simply, I’m a frequent … Continue reading →

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Not Creepy Enough

Posted on May 23, 2012 by Tom Garrett

This 1988 ad for a local optical shop seems misguided at best.  The concept is that their low prices allow customers to purchase two pairs of glasses for the same price that their competitors charge for one pair assembled (is that … Continue reading →

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A Simple Formula

Posted on April 27, 2012 by Tom Garrett

Gawker’s latest in a 374-part series about the “racist” HBO show Girls includes a reference to searching for a “Black Costanza,” meaning someone on television to whom black viewers may relate—but who also happens to look like them. I think I’ve tracked … Continue reading →

Posted in Pictures, Television | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Forgotten Warriors

Posted on April 9, 2012 by Tom Garrett

A lonely figure shuffles across the floor in an empty hall.  Squeak, squeak, squeak.  Each step is itself a minor victory.  “I guess I should be grateful I can still move this well,” he jokes, even then with a twinge … Continue reading →

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Something I Don’t Miss

Posted on February 29, 2012 by Tom Garrett

I’ve gotten a wonderful head start on becoming an old man who constantly reminisces about how much simpler, purer—and, in many cases, better—life used to be before the ubiquity of the internet made us all navel-gazing babies who expect everything … Continue reading →

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Injecting Unwanted Perspective

Posted on February 21, 2012 by Tom Garrett

I do this sometimes. Also: “Slamdunks?!?”

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Ranking the Dwarfs

Posted on February 20, 2012 by Tom Garrett

This year marks the 200th anniversary of the publication of the first edition of Snow White.  Almost all of us are familiar with the Brothers Grimm collected story of the ongoing efforts of an evil queen to snuff out the … Continue reading →

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Meme a Little Meme

Posted on February 16, 2012 by Tom Garrett

Hilarious friends from myriad walks of life have bombarded my Facebook feed with guffaw-inspiring pictures that show the various perceptions about a given occupation.  The purveyors of this meme have extended it to jobs as diverse as public relations people, … Continue reading →

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The Perfect Valentine’s Day

Posted on February 14, 2012 by Tom Garrett

Valentine’s Day (f/k/a St. Valentine’s Day) arrives to bestow upon us its annual bounty of heart-shaped confections and edible unmentionables. Most of us are simultaneously delighted by this wonderful holiday and perplexed by how best to spend it.  Anyone with … Continue reading →

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Ghostbusters: A Narrative Lyrical Analysis

Posted on October 28, 2011 by Tom Garrett

In honor of our impending Halloween weekend* and the zombie Moammar Gaddafis and slutty-fill-in-the-blanks who come with it, I thought it only fitting to scrutinize arguably the greatest sort-of-Halloween-themed song of all time. The song I Want a New Drug … Continue reading →

Posted in Commentary, Music | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments